Dear Christian Friends, Please Do Not Host a Seder: Why Christian Seders Are Deeply Offensive to the Jewish Community

16 min readFeb 28, 2021

Disclaimer

No one person can speak for the Jewish community. While I believe that what follows validly describes the feelings of many fellow members of the Jewish community, I do not have data to support that belief, and Jewish opinions are highly varied. As the saying goes, “2 Jews, 3 opinions”. It is also for that reason, that my argument is not an appeal-to-authority or appeal-to-identity argument; I am not arguing that you should/should-not act because I (or others) take offense; rather, my goal here is to point out underlying facts about the Seder, its history, and its observance and why — from that alone — it logically follows that a Christian observance of it, in light of those facts, might be seen as inauthentic and subversive in ways that a reasonable person (such as yourself) could logically conclude to be offensive.

Why I Am Writing This

You deserve a compelling, convincing explanation as to why hosting a Seder is offensive. While a number of articles have been written over the past few years arguing that it is offensive for non-Jews (and especially Christians) to host a Seder, few have adequately explained why (beyond the superficial fact of applying a Christian lens to a Jewish practice).

What I Am Not Arguing

I am not saying that you are not welcome to attend a Seder hosted by your Jewish friends. I am also not saying that you cannot ask your close Jewish friends to invite you to their Seder if you are curious about an authentic Passover Seder and want to see what one is like. I am also not saying that you cannot create a Seder-inspired “Easter Feast”, “Pascha Feast”, or “Last Supper Remembrance” (with “-inspired” being the key, operative phrase, distinguishing it from the real deal); please just don’t refer to it as “Seder”, please don’t have it on the first nights of Passover, and please do not represent it as something that is representative or authentic to the practice of any Jewish person contemporaneously or historically (which also includes Jesus, who — though not relevant to Judaism — is depicted as a Jewish character in the Christian texts and for which, therefore, assertions about his practice implicitly create an assertion about Jewish practice in the Second Temple time period, which is the premise/setting of the Christian narrative).

More Than “Just” Appropriation

I get it. The word “appropriation” tends to raise some concerns when directed towards Christians from the Jewish community. After all, Christianity — while significantly deviating in its interpretation and adding its own, additional canonical texts — includes the canonical texts of Judaism and is built on a foundation of Judaism (even though many interpretations are diametrically opposite in ways that take it in a very different direction from Judaism). Accordingly, one can reasonably argue that Christianity is, itself, appropriative in its entirety (the counter-argument to this is that Christianity adds a significant amount of additional content and, therefore, meets the bar for inventiveness and originality, an argument that can be similarly applied to Judaism and its sources of inspiration, such as the Great Flood story which can be found in earlier sources such as the “Epic of Gilgamesh”).

However, objections to Christians hosting Sedarim (the plural of Seder) goes much deeper than merely an argument of appropriation. There are many more sources to offensiveness here. These stem both from the underlying themes of Passover as well as from relevant history.

Themes of Passover

In order to understand why Christians hosting a Seder is offensive, it is important to understand some of the key themes of Passover. The themes of Passover include (but are not limited to):

Redemption from slavery in Egypt
God’s one-ness and unique role as redeemer
Jewish peoplehood/nationhood
Anti-Semitism

Redemption from slavery in Egypt

Although the historicity of the redemption story that is central to Passover is lacking in extra-biblical evidence, it is a deeply personal story for those retelling it. As it says in the Haggadah concerning the redemption from slavery in Egypt:

In each generation, a person is obligated to view themselves as-if they left Egypt personally. As it says, “And you shall tell your son on that day to say, ‘it is because of this that God did for me when I left Egypt’.” It was not our ancestors only who were redeemed when the Holy One, the source of blessing is He redeemed us from Egypt; rather, we, too, were redeemed with them.

The Haggadah makes the point that had our ancestors not been redeemed, they and their descendants (i.e., us), would still be enslaved in Egypt. This, however, is not so for the vast, vast majority of Christians; although Christianity, itself, would not have come into existence, its more than 2 billion adherents would still exist and be free, as the majority of Christians became Christian through proselytizing and missionizing, with no ancestral ties to the ancient Israelites. By contrast, the vast, vast majority of Jews have literal Israelite ancestry (and those who are Jewish through conversion have been mutually adopted into the Jewish community thereby having every right to fully claim such ancestry, as well, by virtue of this mutual adoption).

In light of this, a Christian reading this text might be seen not only as a slight to Jewish history and to the personal nature of this retelling, but also as upholding “replacement theology.” Replacement theology is the belief that Christians are the logical continuation and replacement of Jews. And this belief has historically been associated with anti-Semitism (more on that topic later and how Christian Sedarim are offensive in light of that theme).

God’s one-ness and unique role as redeemer

Deification of human beings is antithetical to Judaism. Accordingly, the retelling of the story of the Exodus from Egypt during the Passover Seder intentionally omits any direct mention of Moses; the rabbis wrote him out of the Haggadah’s retelling specifically to prevent idolatrous deification of Moses and the attribution of God’s miracles to anyone but God.

In addition to omitting Moses from the narrative, this theme of rejecting human deification is upheld in the Haggadah’s commentary on Deuteronomy 26:8 (“And HaShem brought us forth out of Egypt…”). The Hagaddah elaborates on this source text, emphasizing God’s sole role:

“I will pass through the land of Egypt”… I, God, and not an angel
“And I will smite every first born in the land of Egypt” … I, God, and not a seraph
“And against all the gods of Egypt will I execute judgement” … I, God, and not a messenger
“I, the Lord” … I, God, and none other

This elaboration in the authentic Haggadah exposition is very much a repudiation of the Christian deification of Jesus, which — from a Jewish lens — is inherently idolatrous and fundamentally at odds with Jewish theology.

While it is okay for someone who is Christian to interpret this text differently, it is important to understand that — even before starting the Seder — the fact that a Christian leading the Seder is often motivated by a desire to get closer to Jesus (based on the belief in Jesus as a supernatural being) is already subversive to this theme and, therefore, inauthentic a priori, even before the beginning of the Seder. It is most likely that someone Christian leading a Seder would omit this part of the Haggadah, further rendering the experience inauthentic. And, in the unlikely event that such a person were to include this text (despite it being in direct opposition to Christian beliefs), one can reasonably assume an inauthentic reinterpretation of that text. And certainly additions to the Seder intended to connect it with Jesus (such as comparing the perforations in the matzah to Jesus’s wounds or the salt water with Jesus’s suffering) only further subvert and distort the Passover observance (and make a mockery and parody of the authentic, Jewish practice of the ritual). That is, it is not merely adding interpretations that happen to differ from Judaism; it is reinterpreting/revising the ritual in a way that is fundamentally opposite to its core theme as well as to key Jewish tenets.

Jewish peoplehood/nationhood

The text of the Haggadah contains the Jewish national narrative, from Abraham (and his repudiation of Terach’s idolatry) to the receiving of the Torah at Mt. Sinai to entering the land of Israel (and ending with “Next year in Jerusalem”, a shared Jewish national aspiration for the future era of ultimate redemption). It also contains within it a recognition of our nationhood/peoplehood, quoting the Torah: “there [in the land of Goshen] [our ancestor Jacob] became a nation, mighty and numerous”.

There are numerous “we”/”us” verses in the Haggadah where the “we”/”us” is in reference to the Jewish people/nation. Leading/reading these texts requires being part of that “us”; to read them, otherwise, is to effectively claim membership in the Jewish nation/people.

Christianity historically decided to put itself outside of that “we”/”us”. It did so not only by choosing to proselytize to non-Jews (quickly causing a majority of Christians to be of non-Jewish heritage), but through an antagonistic (often oppressive if not outright murderous) relationship to the Jewish people. We will get to the topic of anti-Semitism in more detail later. Long story short, the boat has long set sail for Christians to be part of the Jewish people. While we can have positive interfaith relations as well as mutual appreciation and respect, it takes a great deal of chutzpah (audacity, nerve) for Christians to “want in” on being part of the Jewish nation/people now, after Christianity was the principle source of erecting the barrier between Jewish identity and Christian identity. While we can be dear friends and get along, claiming our peoplehood/nationhood in light of that history is simply not an option. Please respect that.

Anti-Semitism

Anti-Semitism is a key theme of the Passover retelling. The Haggadah is not merely recounting the story of Pharoah’s anti-Semitism. Rather, it examines anti-Jewish hatred more broadly.

This can be seen in the song “Veh Hee Sheh’Umduh”, which contains the line:

In each and every generation, they rise up against us to annihilate us

This theme can also be seen in the Haggadah citation of “Arami oved avi”:

Go and learn what Laban the Aramean sought to do to our father Jacob. While Pharaoh decreed against the male children only, Laban sought to uproot all, as it is written: an Aramean [Laban] tried to destroy my father…

Although the underlying phrasing (Arami oved avi) has other, alternative translations/interpretations (such as, for example, “my father was a wandering Aramean”), this particular interpretation in the Haggadah fits into the broader theme of exploring anti-Semitism.

In examining the motivations of Pharoah for oppressing our ancestors, the Haggadah hits upon a recurring theme of anti-Semitism that resonates to this day. The Haggadah text, in elaborating on the mistreatment at the hands of the Egyptians cites Exodus 1:10:

Come, let us act cunningly with [the Israelites], lest they multiply and, if there should be a war against us, they will join our enemies and fight against us…

This citation is, effectively, the “dual loyalty” (more accurately: disloyalty/divided-loyalty) trope and is a recurring theme of anti-Semitic belief that can be found in present-day manifestations.

It is in the context of pervasive historical anti-Semitism that the Haggadah text traditionally includes the Shefokh Khamatkhah (“Pour out your wrath..”) paragraph. This paragraph calls for divine retribution against those peoples/nations that have metaphorically “devoured Jacob”.

Given the historical role that Christianity has played in promoting and enacting anti-Semitism, it is highly inappropriate for someone who is Christian to be in the driver’s seat for this. Leading such a role is to effectively claim that Christians are the principle victim of anti-Semitism. While, on rare occasions, Christian individuals can be victimized by anti-Semitism (such as when they are incorrectly perceived to be or labeled as Jewish), Christians are not the primary target of anti-Semitism. Moreover, Christians are historically a major purveyor of anti-Semitism (and, on the whole, are represented far more among its causes than among its victims). For a Christian to read “in every generation, they rise up against us to annihilate us” is very disingenuous and contravenes the very long history of anti-Semitism, including Christian religious anti-Semitism.

On the topic of historical anti-Semitism, this takes us to our next point…

History

Christian Religious Anti-Semitism

Anti-Semitic sentiment can be found very early on in the history of Christianity such as, for example, in the Epistle of Barnabas (circa 70 CE — 132 CE) and in “An Answer to the Jews”, the latter written by Church father Tertullian (155–240 CE).

Christian religious anti-Semitism can be found both in Catholicism and also, post-Reformation, in Protestantism. For example, the Protestant Reformer Martin Luther infamously wrote the anti-Semitic screed “On the Jews and their Lies”. This work calls for burning Jewish texts, committing acts of arson against Jewish homes and synagogues, and outright murdering Jews.

For all of the above reasons and, especially in light of the Passover theme concerning anti-Semitism, it is offensive for Christians to lead a Passover Seder. But, beyond this, it is especially the case when it comes to Passover, more so than for any Jewish holiday, including other Jewish holidays for which anti-Semitism is a pertinent theme…

One of the most pernicious (and murderous) anti-Semitic myths historically is the “blood libel”. The blood libel is/was a false allegation that Jews use the blood of Christian children in religious rituals. This libel has a strong association with Passover, with such allegations being made concerning the four cups of wine drunk during the Seder or in relation to the ingredients used in making matzah (eaten throughout Passover, including during the Seder). Given that Jewish Passover observance has frequently been abused by Christians historically to allege Jewish malfeasance and incite murderous mobs against the Jewish community, it feels especially insensitive for someone who is Christian to now positively claim the holiday by leading it.

Christian Distancing from Passover

Because of anti-Semitic sentiment, the Church very early on sought to distance itself from traditional Jewish practice and rituals. This was institutionalized in the First Ecumenical Council of Nicaea (325 CE), which deliberately separated the Christian computation for Easter from the Jewish computation for Passover. Other Christian decrees forbade Jews and Christians from eating together, discriminated against the subset of Christians of Jewish heritage, and otherwise sought to distinguish Christian religious practice from Jewish practice.

Seeking to return to Christianity’s “Jewish roots” goes against a long, long list of Christian rulings and decrees that were based in anti-Jewish animus. While acknowledgements that these decrees were wrong in the first place are welcome, this is not enough to be able to gain the “benefits” of undoing what Christianity, itself, enacted in the first place. Having originally chosen this route, it is fitting that Christianity fully own the logical consequences of those decisions, including ceding any legitimate claim of ownership related to these Jewish practices.

Evolution of the Seder

Judaism is an ever-evolving religion. It is not static. It is a common misconception among Christians that Christianity innovated on top of a stagnant, non-evolving Judaism, while Judaism was and has remained backwards and non-innovative for millennia. This is simply not so.

There has been significant innovation and evolution throughout the history of Judaism. And this is especially true of the period following the destruction of the Second Temple. Following the Second Temple’s destruction in 70 CE, there was a need to replace rituals that centered around animal sacrifice (which could be performed only in the Temple) with alternative rituals. Up until that point, the Passover observance centered primarily on the sacrifice (and consumption) of the Paschal lamb (a literal lamb, not a metaphorical one — more on that later).

The Seder, as it is practiced today, is very dissimilar from the practice during the Second Temple period. Although some parts of the Haggadah predate the destruction of the Second Temple (such as the Torah sources cited by the Haggadah as well as Mishnaic declaration by Rabban Gamliel that “one who has not said these three words — Pesach, Matzah, and Maror — has not fulfilled their obligation”), much of the Haggadah came about later by numerous different authors. The core text of the Haggadah was not finalized until circa 700–800 CE. Even so, some elements common to Haggadot (plural of Haggadah) today (such as the songs Chad Gadya, Echad Mi Yodeya) come about much, much later than that (in the late 1500s).

Suffice it to say that a Jew during the Second Temple period would not be using a Maxwell House Haggadah and would not be talking about what Rabbi Hillel was doing “when the Temple still stood”. And this is where, especially, the most common Christian motivation for leading a Seder in the first place simply does not make sense. According to the Christian narrative, Jesus was a Jewish person living in the times of the Second Temple. Given a goal of “celebrating Passover the way that Jesus would have” or “getting closer to Jesus’s own practices”, observing Jewish rituals that developed long after that time period simply does not serve that goal.

Additional Issues

The Lamb

It is well understood in Judaism that the lamb in the Passover story is a literal lamb. Judaism has a history of animal sacrifice as its mode of worship. Moreover, human sacrifice is antithetical to Judaism (indeed, the entire punchline of the story of the Akeidah, the binding of Isaac, is that God does not condone human sacrifice) and thus equating a person with something being sacrificed simply does not fit within Jewish theology. On top of this, it is understood in Jewish commentary (extrapolating based on the Torah text) that a lamb was chosen because the Egyptians of that time period worshipped lambs; the sacrifice of a literal lamb was, therefore, intended to repudiate their idolatry and could effectively distinguish Israelites from Egyptians; the latter could not paint their doorposts with lamb’s blood, because sacrificing a lamb to obtain such blood would have been taboo in their culture in contradistinction to the Israelites who had no issue with such sacrifices.

Christianity, however, views Jesus as having been a sacrifice for atonement. And, in that view, likens Jesus to a lamb. Consequently, it is quite common to hear of Christians interpreting the Paschal lamb as being Jesus or in some way connected to or related to Jesus.

Needless to say that injecting this interpretation — which is likely to happen in a Seder led by someone of a Christian background — is highly inauthentic to a traditional Seder. Not only is it inauthentic, but it is also subversive to the original in that it advances an idea that contradicts Jewish belief and upholds ideas and beliefs that go against fundamental Jewish tenets.

“I converted to Christianity as an adult, having grown up Jewish. Are you saying I can’t host my Jewish family for Passover as I’ve been doing for the past 10 years just because I converted?”

This article wasn’t for you. This article was for Christians with no cultural background, knowledge, sensitivity, etc. hosting a Seder for a primarily Christian audience, who are imbuing the Jewish ritual with Christian meaning, and whose motivation comes from an offensive place (desiring to get closer to Jesus by appropriating a Jewish practice). Given the primarily Jewish audience (your family) and your own upbringing, one can conclude that your motivation is consistent with an acceptable one that is largely the same as for many other Jews who are observing Passover (spending time with family) and that your practice of it will be authentic.

“I’m not Jewish, but my spouse is Jewish, and I promised I would help my spouse to raise our children as Jews. Are you saying that I cannot help my spouse with the Seder?”

This article wasn’t for you. The motivation of faithfully passing along a Jewish ritual to the next generation is a pure one and removes any doubt that you will do so authentically.

“I get what you are saying, but I really, really like the Seder and I still want to have one. What can I do to make it less offensive?”

Treat it like you would any other intellectual property. Originality is key to being able to create a derivative work that is generally seen as acceptable. If your practice is 90+% original, the odds of people taking offense are way less. Start with the name; call it something other than a “Seder”. You can keep the core of “having a set order”, having a song that indicates the order, and including a festive meal as part of it; however, please come up with a different set of rituals (besides the meal) and a different order for those rituals. Make it truly inventive, applying Christian meaning to entirely new rituals rather than imposing Christian meaning on Jewish rituals for which such meaning is foreign and for which such an imposition reminds the Jewish community of forcible conversions and other offenses under Christian hegemony.

Conclusion

There are multiple ways in which Christian “ownership” of a Seder by virtue of leading/hosting one comes across as historically ignorant as well as insensitive to the Jewish community. While there is no problem joining a Seder at the invitation of a Jewish friend, the decision to actively host or lead a Seder is likely to be taken in a negative light by some if not most Jews for the reasons outlined above. Please share this with your own Christian friends, your Church, and any other fellow Christians should you become aware that they are considering leading or hosting a Seder so that they are aware of this.

References

Here are some of the sources that I used for the information above (or to double-check information that I had previously learned as part of my Jewish education):